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Challenge your Mindset

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7 steps to avoiding haters

haters

Everyone has their critics and naysayers. It’s impossible for everyone in this world to like you, but what makes someone want to act on this dislike? If you feel like you come across people too often who put you down or deliberately get in your way, there are steps you can take to avoid them.

1) Stay private

Keep all your social networking of ‘truths’ or emotions limited to people you know well and like or you can join our anonymous community to share with a supportive group without any fears of exposure. Haters thrive off finding dirt on people, to the extent they will dedicate large portions of time into finding all your flaws and mistakes to make themselves feel better. You don’t have to feel bad about things you’ve done if you’ve learnt your lesson and resolved the situation. If a hater brings up the past, bring them into the present.

2) Keep working

Haters are jealous people. Instead of working hard to achieve the things they resent you for achieving, they’ll remain at a standstill. Their bitterness isn’t your fault. If anything, keep doing what you’re doing. Make them feel worse, because they’re doing it to themselves, just like you’re working hard for you. Hate is often about the self, not others. [10 Reasons why you should always be your unique self] 

3) Be kind

‘Kill them with kindness’ isn’t just a nice-sounding phrase, it’s a great truth. Haters’ worst enemy is positivity, and if you give them too much positivity to argue against, they will look irrational and stupid to others. Be a good person whenever you can and focus on people who appreciate it. It’ll make you much happier, and you’ll care less about the detractors. [5 Ways to be kinder to yourself] 

4) Seek thrills

Something as simple as boredom makes a hater. They need some excitement so they ruffle a few feathers. Copy the hater, but find some excitement that’s more positive. It’s easy to get sucked into the tedious cycle of trading insults and being the entertainment to a few other people’s lives, but it won’t fulfil you. Book a holiday, try a new activity or do something you find fun, why not set a goal here in our network. Remove yourself from spaces where haters lurk.

5) Embrace change

If you feel parts of your life have become stagnant, move on. Haters who aren’t targeting you can still effect you. They are the victims of the world. They wish things were how they used to be, moan about the insignificant things and refuse to see the romance or niceties in anything. Such soulless, mechanical thinking can be contagious and will bring you down. Don’t long for the past but do something about your future and visualise it here. It might involve break-ups, relocations or promotions, but that’s better than staying around haters.

6) Get dramatic

Brush up on your acting skills to one-up a hater. Trick them into thinking their campaign of hate against you is working. Every time they bring their pessimism to your successes, discredit any ideas or focus on inconsequential flaws in a much grander plan of yours, pretend that you care. You’ll lull them into a false sense of security before turning their world upside down. If a hater wants to stop you going ahead with something, go ahead with it anyway behind their backs. Your defiance will hurt their pride and maybe they’ll learn a lesson not to put other people down.

7) Offer to help them

It’s a common set up in films: two people who hate each other pair up and overcome their differences for the greater good. If an opportunity arises when they need someone to assist them, volunteer. This might sound like a dreadful idea, but hate is normally love gone wrong. A personal insecurity makes a lot of people hate someone they would love if circumstances were different. Think about it – whether you hate or love someone, you care about them. Force them to collaborate with you and they’ll have to put hatred to the side in order to progress and get somewhere. To boost your daily happiness and confidence download one of our planners here.

A hater is often somebody who has no reason to. It is built up on a source of negativity in their lives that they don’t want to tackle head on, so they force it onto someone else. You may have given some people reasons to dislike you in the past, but that’s best handled with a good conversation and a mutual agreement to stay out of each other’s way. If someone gives you constant grief, know that you don’t have to put up with it.

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This article was contributed by Pink Moods.