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How to regain joy in a relationship


The flying sparks, total obsession, unpredictable highs and lows of the honeymoon period can understandably never last forever. Our body only has the energy to sustain this period for a while before you settle down into a more comfortable, stable period of the relationship. For some, this is the end of the road and behind the passion of the honeymoon period there wasn’t much in existence. For the lucky ones, their life continues perfectly.

However for others, the routine of a normal relationship might lose it’s joy and when this happens we need to learn how to regain it!

The time-line of a relationship

All relationships start out with excitement as we learn more about each other [3 questions to ask to see if you have a connection] and slowly build up the blocks of their character. At this stage we want to know everything at once and our desire to see more of them and get to know more of them is strong. However as the relationship goes on it becomes nice to settle into knowing each other well and enjoying doing ‘your things’. This is a very comfortable way to live your life and it allows you to focus on others things such as friends, family and your career. However for some people they become so settled that they turn away from their relationship completely to attend to others things and then at a moment of realisation they look back and see how they do not give or receive anything from it.

This growing change that we did not recognise can shock us and can result in insecurity and feeling alone. Nobody intends to neglect their relationship but without keeping it closely grasped to your heart it can accidentally happen. So how do we regain the joy we once had?

Regaining the joy

Many make the mistake that they need to re-create the way it was in the past, but trying to take a step back to somewhere you have once been in your relationship is never going to feel like the natural move to make. Instead, regaining the joy in your relationship should be about moving it into a new phase.

1) Try a new experience together​

Start up something new together where you can enjoy each other’s company in a new situation that is fresh for both of you. It could be exercising together or travelling together. But doing something that you both enjoy helps you to have fun in each other’s company and can give you an opportunity to learn and admire new skills in each other.

2) Communicate

Open up about how you are feeling, what you are thinking and what you wish for. Involving each other in your lives keeps you communicating and in touch with how the other feels, but eventually you will rely on them to be the one person who you want to talk to about everything which is an important part of feeling needed in a relationship.

3) Spark up your intimacy

It has been said countless times that reigniting your sex life is crucial to bringing back the joy into a relationship. But the intimate part of the relationship is what seals your relationship and therefore having a healthy sex [5 reasons why love and sex sometimes don't go together] life helps keep you intimate and aware of the other person by helping you seem them as the person you are in love with.

What works for different relationships entirely depends upon the individual; if something doesn’t work initially don’t be discouraged to try other ways to find out what best works for you. Sign up for more relationship advice via expert videos, ebooks and more for just £9.99 annually here.


Photo Credit: Copyright: auremar / 123RF Stock Photo

Tags:despair, joy, lonely, misery, sad, unhappy


This article was contributed by Pink Moods.

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