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Challenge your Mindset

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How are you feeling?

Mantras to follow when you’re feeling mad with someone.


Anger is a tricky emotion. Because it’s too hard to channel in the correct way, people often back away from it and instead hold onto other, more internal emotions like resentment, bitterness and angst. When someone makes you mad, don’t ignore the anger but stop and think about it for a while.

Here are some helpful mantras provided by some of the world’s most respected figures to help you consider your anger.

“Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.” -Buddha

Anger that isn’t released hurts you. It can be a powerful emotion and not letting go of it will make you miserable. You will feel wronged, hold grudges and follow a pessimistic view of life. The person you were feeling mad at can likely get on with their life without this because you didn’t communicate your anger. Take the pain away and don’t bottle up your anger.

“Angry people are not always wise.” - Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice

It’s important to think before you put across your feelings. When you are mad, you can say spur-of-the-moment things that don’t make sense or you could live to regret. Speaking angrily leaves you vulnerable, as other people can escape consequences by focussing on it and taking a moral high ground over you. Be wise and intelligent in conversation. Let the anger burn slowly.

“Usually when people are sad, they don’t do anything. They just cry over their condition. But when they get angry, they bring about a change.” – Malcolm X

Anger isn’t always a negative emotion. It is explosive and powerful to the mind and can be the trigger to act when wronged. If you are mad at someone, take the initiative. Sadness leads to self-pity and a strange comfort in being the victim or the underdog. It is the anger you need to hold onto to make things better for yourself.

“Anger at lies lasts forever. Anger at truth can’t last.” – Greg Evans

Whilst truth is something we all claim to value, we don’t always react to it the best way. The truth can be ugly and personal, and we become angry at those who dare speak the truth which conflicts with what we believe or want for ourselves. Think about whether you’re mad at the person or mad at yourself for operating under false impressions. The truth can hurt but it will benefit you in the end.

“Men in rage strike those that wish them best.” - William Shakespeare, Othello, Act 2, Scene 3

Another important reason to not act rashly when angry is the consequences. Those who love and support us can also get hurt. Don’t risk upsetting, or in extreme cases, losing the ones you care about when angry. Save your anger for where it needs to be directed to. Anger is good when it leads to building bridges, not burning them.

“Bitterness is like cancer. It eats upon the host. But anger is like fire. It burns it all clean.” – Maya Angelou

Anger can also be cathartic. A strong release of emotion means you can let whatever made you angry go. Often the repression of anger is what causes most pain to you, and allowing yourself to scream and cry and admit the pain you’ve suffered is how you move on. If you want to understand a bit more about the root causes of anger and how to manage it most effectively visit our Video Moods Series for some support.

It’s important to look at your feelings neutrally. It’s not a bad thing to be mad at someone but it’s not a good thing either. Use your feelings productively. Aim them at the right people, at the right situation for the right conclusion. The idea of mantras has Buddhist routes and ultimately comes back to reminding yourself of your inner calm.

We are not all spiritual, but it’s good to take respite and allow yourself to calm down and forget everyone else but yourself. You can adopt or alter the mantra suggestions above to your needs, but trust that they can do you no wrong.


This article was contributed by Pink Moods.

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