Positive thinking, that well worn phrase born in the 1980’s. What is it and does it really work?
Well, the simple answer is yes it does. What doesn’t work is to adopt the habit of thinking positively without backing it up with focused, specific action.
I remember hearing one of the masters of positive thinking, Tony Robbins say “no matter how often you stare at the grass and recite don’t grow don’t grow…The grass is going to grow because that’s what grass does!”
This simple statement highlights having to know, and accept what you can and can’t change. You cannot think yourself slimmer, fix years of low self esteem or fix your miserable relationship by repeating a positive affirmation several times a day. But, and it’s a BIG but, you absolutely can change all of those things and anything else in your life, by creating a positive, specific, focused and flexible plan of action.
Creating a positive outlook
Creating a positive outlook changes the hard wiring in your brain. Let’s face it, we aren’t born believing we’re stupid, dull, ugly or incapable of greatness, are we? No, of course not. To give you a simple analogy, imagine you’re born with a mind equal to a blank canvas, much like the blank hard drive on a new computer.
From the moment you arrive into the world you are bombarded with messages. What it means to be a woman, what we’re supposed to do with our lives, become a mother, get educated, get a good job, find a husband and settle down to family life. Be a great mother, wife, and friend as well as bring in money to help support the family. Oh and don’t forget one of my favourites, don’t be promiscuous… Heaven forbid we should actually enjoy our bodies and sex in the same way men do… Without guilt or judgement (but that’s a whole other subject) the point is we are conditioned by our families, friends, teachers and the culture we are born into.
The great news is you can change all of this through the right use of positive thinking. You can be whoever you want to be. Powerful, sexy, funny, bright, intelligent, compassionate and so much more.
Having worked with women for over ten years, I know without doubt the depth of our ability is immense. The message I’m trying to convey is it’s your life, you decide who you want to be, what rules you follow, create your own values and let go of the ones you’ve been programmed to adopt.
So how do you go about starting?
Firstly, grab a paper and pen and ask yourself what you believe about yourself. Don’t filter it, write out anything that springs to mind. Just ask yourself the question “I believe… ” and fill in the blanks. Now look at your list and put a plus or minus next to each one depending on whether it feels positive or not to you. You decide who you want to be, what you stand for, what makes you you? Get passionate and keep writing! If you need more help on discovering your unique qualities subscribe to our self discovery section.
Next ask yourself “What needs to change? What stops your light shining bright?” More than likely you’ll start to see the negative messages you’ve received from the world around you whilst growing up.
Positive thinking is about changing your beliefs, your conditioning and by doing that you change your focus. It’s like being on the road of life and seeing that there’s always another road, seeing the endless choices available to you. It may not happen overnight but the more you focus on what you want and start taking action the better you’ll start to feel. Once you start you’ll automatically start to think differently, act differently, feel differently and then you’ll start to notice you’re getting dramatically different results.
You only live once so start to enjoy it!