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Challenge your Mindset

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The benefit of letting go of negative thinking …


Your Life Today – Why do we get into negative habits and patterns of thinking?

Most of us have no idea how much negative thinking runs through our minds every day!

And, if there’s any truth in the saying: “What we focus on, we create!” Then having negative thoughts and using negative language isn’t very helpful!

A positive thought is far more inspiring and uplifting than negative ones. The art of being positive is a simple and smart way for you to encourage yourself in whatever you are doing, thinking or planning, as well as an important tool in building confidence.

When we are naturally positive, it is more likely to give you the push, the impetus and the strength to do things, that you may be unsure of and yet are willing to give them a go.

Negative thinking can hold you back, can stop you from achieving, exploring, doing; it is linked to a lack of confidence, self-doubt and fear. If we don’t give ourselves a chance to do new and different things because we talk ourselves out of it with negative thinking, we are stunting our own growth as people, our own personal development and our lives!

Do you agree that this is a great reason to start to change your thinking?

How and why we so easily fill our minds with negative thinking is due to the fact that most of our thoughts are automatic and repetitive; whether we like it or not we are the product of our upbringing and the values and opinions of those who impacted us most in our lives, especially the earlier part of our lives.

And yes, there are times when we do doubt ourselves, when we are afraid to do something new or different and we do feel we lack confidence, and by having lots of negative thoughts, we will instinctively confirm these emotions.

How often do you find yourself repeating the words of your parents when guiding or advising someone else? That’s an ingrained pattern. And, too often, we copy and repeat the negativity we have picked up around us over many years which is also deeply ingrained and your default way of being; unless you make the decision and the effort to do something about this, it will continue for always.

Here’s a simple example, which you can test yourself next time you’re in a restaurant. When looking at the menu, ask your friend what do they want to eat? Most of the time, the first response will be a list of what they DON’T want to eat!

Remember that old adage I mentioned earlier: “What we focus on, we create!” If that is true, then isn’t it about time we change our thoughts and language to reflect what we want rather than what we don’t want?!

Breaking the Habit of Negative Thinking

The key question is: does it always have to be this way?

If you are in a hurry to an appointment, you’re stuck on the tube in between stations, or in a traffic jam because of unexpected road works on your route, what are you most likely to say to yourself, and what do you think you will be feeling? Anger, frustration, worry about being late, irritation, tension, stress – some or all of those?

So let me ask you this: in what way do you benefit from all these negative thoughts and feelings?



And even though you know this logically, chances are you will still react in this negative way most if not every time you are caught up in one of these disruptive situations.

And, herein lies the difference; I refer to the situation as “disruptive” – it is not negative, it’s a fact and it’s outside of anyone’s control to change it, so if you want to be a happier and more balanced person overall, you can do these two things:

1. Change your interpretation of events and situations by changing your language and,

2. Bearing in mind you really cannot do anything about certain situations, stop the negative self-talk that you have fed yourself until now.

Your New Life – How to be More Positive

When you start thinking positively you will find that you naturally feel more at ease about a lot of things that in the past may have bothered you. The reason for this is that as soon as you change how you perceive an event or a situation, you become more accepting and therefore calmer.

Being more positive will become easier and more automatic for you the more you apply these tips that I have included to help you with this change.

When you are more positive it will influence who you are, how you are and how you interact with others. You will feel happier and more relaxed overall and you will manage tricky or stressful situations in a way that is healthier and more balanced, which only leads to you having a better experience of life.

– Find a new way, a positive way of interpreting situations that in the past have brought about a negative reaction in you

– As often as you can, notice when you are saying something negative or thinking a negative thought and immediately replace it with a positive one; within three weeks you will find you naturally have more positive thoughts effortlessly; practice makes perfect!

– Make it a “game” you play in your mind, switching a negative thought to a positive one, until it becomes your new pattern, your default way of thinking, the new you!

– Mentally reward yourself for every positive thought you have or words you say; give yourself a pat on the back, I mean literally take your right (or left) palm, and tap yourself on the opposite shoulder and very quietly say to yourself “well done me!” Believe me nobody will notice what you are doing, and yet the impact of giving yourself a pat on the back will be to encourage you both consciously and subconsciously to do more of this new uplifting positive thinking!

Be careful, you may catch yourself right now having negative thoughts about what you’ve just read! If so, start right now! Catch yourself in this moment and change that negative thought right away to a positive one!

Do that now and you are already on track to the new happier, more positive you!



Natalie Dee

With over 10 years experience as a professional life coach, Natalie Dee works worldwide with both personal life coaching and executive life coaching clients. Formally trained in High Performance Coaching, Master Practitioner of NLP - Neuro Linguistic Programming, Advanced EFT - Emotional Freedom Technique, and Hypnotherapy. Natalie’s clients benefit from her additional extensive training in a wide range of areas relating to personal development. Natalie’s clients are professional people who are committed to making positive and effective life changes, to achieve what they truly want for themselves. Natalie knows that the smallest shift in your thought and behavioural patterns can bring about exponential changes in your life! Just like the tiniest tweak in how you hold your golf club or tennis racquet can completely change your game! Based in London, coaching sessions are mostly by phone, Skype and face-to-face.