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Challenge your Mindset

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How are you feeling?

Why you should live your life without comparisons


Friends, co-workers, family…we are all liable to having a peek over the fence into others’ lives and left wanting for what appears to be a picture perfect lifestyle. These should- be fleeting thoughts sometimes coagulate into a pool of negativity which can tend to breed feelings of envy, insecurity and lack of self- worth. And by focusing on others lifestyle it actually sets us two steps back in our own.

‘You can’t be envious and happy at the same time’

Essentially, wanting what someone else has and not having it is going to make us unhappy. If we pine after something that is not in our own life it highlights a very obvious black hole in that we tend to fill with the feelings associated with what is missing. Understanding that everyone is different, and we all have our private successes in various aspects of our lives is important, and we might not know how many people are looking over our own fence.

‘The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind the scenes to everyone else’s highlight reel’

Of course every other relationship but your own appears perfect, as you will rarely ever see the unedited view. Where we can, we like to show the best versions of ourselves and what we need to remember is that we are pretty good at doing that. Our Facebook accounts show the perfectly preened versions of ourselves, our relationship is on it’s best behaviour when we go out for meals. You will never know what goes on behind closed doors, as things are not always how they appear.

‘I have insecurities, of course, but I don’t hang around to anyone who points them out to me.’

Where are these insecurities coming from? A hurtful experience with a partner, or an unsuccessful idea at work? Whatever aspect of your life you begin to observe in others suggests that this is the area you need to be focusing on. If you are noticing yourself watching other couples, question what is making you feel like your own relationship is not adequate. Sometimes, recognizing what we envy in others could give us the kick start to find why we are feeling insecure in that part of our lives, and how we can stop it. If you struggle with recognising what you want in a relationship read our eBook on ‘A journey to the love of your life’ to find out what could make you happy.

‘Envy is the art of counting the other fellows blessings instead of your own’

Best of all, focus on what you DO have in your life. You might have a great family, successful job or your dream home. Write down all the things that you have achieved in your life and let those be the things you pride yourself on. Whilst anything you need to improve can be done on your own terms with your own goals- and not based on the achievements of others. As no success will be the same for any person.

Speaking to our life coaches can help you manage your lifestyle in the best way in order to fulfil all your goals in a way that is manageable and realistic. You have all the potential to have a great life, so enjoy it!


This article was contributed by Pink Moods.

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